Like a cruel angel...
...young boy, become a legend.
Even though the blue wind knocked at the door of your heart...
...you kept looking and smiling only at me.
Lost while searching for something soft...
...your honest eyes show that you haven't realized your fate.
But someday, you'll recognize that on your back...
...you have the wings to fly to the distant future.
A cruel revelation from the angels will fly out from a window soon.
When you deny your memory with your spurting and burning pathos...
Shine and hold up the sky. Young boy, become a legend.
Neon Genesis
The reason to exist, La raison d'�tre
The reason to be allowed to be here.
Ikari Shinji. In his case,
The boy wished to die.
The other boy accepted the wish.
The Final Angel disappeared.
Yet, Ikari Shinji is anguished.
Why did you kill him?
There was no other choice!
Why did you kill him?
Because Kaoru-kun was... He was an Angel!
Although he is a human as well?
No! Angel!
He was our enemy!
Although he was a human as well?
NO! NO! I SAY NO!
He was a human, like me.
NO!
He was an Angel.
So you killed him?
THAT'S RIGHT!
Otherwise, we would have been killed.
Everybody would have been killed.
So you killed him?
I did not want to kill him.
Yet, there was no other choice!
So you killed.
Help!
So you killed.
Help!
So you killed.
Help!
So you killed.
Somebody help me!
So you killed.
Help! Is there anybody! Somebody help me!
Yes. It's Kaoru-kun that should have survived.
He was much better than I am.
He should have survived.
No.
A surviver must have the will to survive.
He wished to die.
He abandoned the will to live, and depended on the false hope.
You are not wrong.
Is that really so?
Anxiety
Was that what I wished?
Obsession
I can't figure it out.
What shall I do?
What Shall I DO!
What do you fear?
What?
What do you fear?
Me.
What do you fear?
To be disliked.
What do you fear?
By whom?
What do you fear?
Who?
What do you fear?
That's my father!
He deserted me!
I was disliked.
What shall I do if I am disliked?
What shall I do?
Where am I?
Where shall I go?
Nothing visible.
Nothing intelligible.
Misato-san?
Misato-san!
Hey, where are you?
Hey, where shall I go from now on?
Misato-san!
Asuka!
Ayanami!
Touji!
Kensuke!
Ritsuko-san!
Kaji-san!
Father!
Mother!
Tell me,
What I should do!
Evangelion Unit One.
I have to pilot this, after all,
killing the one that I loved,
obeying the words from my father and others.
You say I must fight in this?
Mom! Say something! Answer me!
Why pilot Eva?
Because People ask me to pilot.
So you pilot?
Isn't it OK? It's for the sake of everybody! Isn't it OK?
You pilot Eva for the sake of others?
Yes!
That is a good thing.
That is a very good thing.
Everyone praises me, then.
That's a lie.
You idiot.
After all, it's for your own sake.
Eh?
And you excuse yourself as always.
Do I?
To think that you are doing your best for the sake
of others is an easy way to live.
Is that so?
In other words, you are lonely, Shinji.
Is that so?
That's nothing but a dependent or symbiotic relationship.
That might be.
All you wish is that people depend on you.
That might be.
All you do is waiting for someone to give you happiness.
A false happiness.
That's the very thing you do.
Soryuu Asuka Langley.
In her case,
I'm in Eva without my intention.
I'm forced to be in this.
This junk won't move!
Oh, no, it's me that is junk.
Useless, that's me.
No one needs me.
No one needs a pilot who cannot control an Eva.
You are trying to find yourself within others.
Shut up!
Anxiety of separation.
You fear being alone.
Anxiety of separation.
You fear because you'd be erased together with others.
Anxiety of separation.
So you pilot.
Affection behavior.
Shut up!
Affection behavior.
Shut up! Shut up!
I don't wanna be told that by a doll like you!
The third character
Ayanami Rei, in her case,
Who am I?
Ayanami Rei.
Who are you?
Ayanami Rei
You are also Ayanami Rei?
Yes. The thing called Ayanami Rei.
All these are the things called Ayanami Rei.
Why all of these are me?
Because others call us Ayanami Rei.
Why do you have a false mind and a false body?
Not false, for I am I.
No. You are a human whose false soul was made
by a man named Ikari Gendou.
You are a false object which is pretending to be a human.
Look, you have a dark, invisible, and unintelligible mind within you,
...where the true you exists.
I am I.
I've become me in the instrumentality of the
links between me and others.
I've been formed by the intercouse with others.
The intercouse with people and the flow of time
changed the shape of my mind.
Those are bonds?
Yes. Those have formed me so far, the thing called Ayanami Rei.
And, those will form me from now on.
Those are bonds?
But, there's someone else who is the true you.
You don't know her.
Because you don't want to see that. You are trying to run away.
Because of fear.
Because she might not have a human shape.
Because the present me might disappear.
fear
One fears that the Self could disappear.
Fear?
Doesn't make sense.
The world of the Self will disappear.
Are you not afraid?
The Self will disappear.
Are you not afraid?
No, I'm glad.
I am a thing that wishes to die.
All I need is to disappear.
I want to be a nothingness.
You can't be a nothingness.
That person won't let you be a nothingness.
Still not allowed to return.
I've existed because he needed me.
But, it's the end.
Useless, will I be.
Deserted by him, will I be.
I've hoped for that day, although I fear it now.
Let's go.
You've existed for the sake of today, this day, Rei.
Yes.
And...
The complementation by the instrumentality of man begins.
Shinji Again.
What feeling is this?
That is what I feel like I experienced before.
My body seems like disappearing.
Agreeable.
I feel like spreading, and becoming large,
to here, there and everywhere.
That was the very beginning of the complementation of the people by the instrumentality of man.
Things people lost.
The lost minds.
Complementing the void in the mind.
The complementation by the instrumentality of minds and soul begins.
All things return to nothingness.
The complementation by the instrumentality of man has just begun.
No,
It's not that everything returns to nothingness.
It's returning everything to the beginning.
Nothing but returning things to the mother
which has long since been lost.
All the minds become one, obtaining peace forever.
Nothing but that.
Is that the instrumentality of man project?
Right.
We always have an emptiness, something lost in our minds.
It yields the starvation within our minds.
It yields anxiety and fear within our minds.
Everybody fears darkness within his mind,
which one tries to escape from, tries to erase.
That's how people live.
But, nobody can ever escape from that.
So you unify people's minds and
make them complement each other?
How dare you presume to make the entirety of human existence into an experiment to prove your theory?!
And to use deception in order to accomplish it?!
Yet, you are the one who's wished for that.
Really?
Where am I?
In the case of Katsuragi Misato
This is the Me within your mind.
At the same time, it's my mind within you, isn't it?
In order for me to find me, I have to feel many kinds of people.
I have to gaze inside of me.
I have to gaze into the Misato-san within me.
What do you hope?
You want to be a good child.
Must I be a good child?
Why?
Since I don't have a daddy
Since I have to help mom, I must be a good child?
But, I don't want to be like you, mom.
When daddy is absent, mom is always crying.
Don't cry!
Don't depend!
So I must be a good child?
So that my daddy won't dislike me?
But I hate my father.
And I hated being a good child.
I hated it!
I'm tired of
keeping myself pure.
Keeping myself pretending to be pure.
I'm tired.
I wish to dirty myself.
I wished to see the Me dirty.
So you let him hold you?
So you let that guy hold you?
NO!
I let him do it, because I loved him.
You truly loved him?
Obviously!
He accepted what I truly was.
Really?
He was tender.
NO!
Don't show this to Shinji-kun!
You don't have to be ashamed of that moment.
I am ashamed of it.
Why feel shame?
You can show it to the guy you love.
Moreover, you wish to show this.
NO! Stop!
You must be glad to show this to Shinji.
NO!
NO! NO WAY!
I wonder.
It's to your father that you wan to show this.
NO!
You tried to find peace in Kaji-kun's arms.
NO!
You tried to find a peace in Kaji-kun's kindness.
NO!
You tried to find your father in Kaji-kun's arms.
NO!
YES.
I found the father within Kaji-kun back then.
So I fled from him.
I feared.
He was just like my father.
But, it was because I was happy,
It was a joy.
It was truly an enjoyable joy!
So I did hate.
So I did separate.
No reason to begin love, but a reason to end the love.
You are so kind..
You are so kind.. So I beg you, disgrace me.
Don't hurt yourself only because you hate yourself now.
Punishing yourself is only a trick to make you feel better for a little while.
Don't do that.
Andnow you're going to say, "you must take care of yourself"?
Guys always do so.
And Guys work, and Guys go into their world, leaving me behind.
Just like my father.
Always trying to escape from the hardships in reality.
Hardship in reality?
It's me?
It's me. Yes. It's me.
It's inevitable.
Stop, Misato-san.
I despise myself.
I hate myself!
You're vulgar and impure.
Pathetic!
Disgusting! You're a dirty whore!
Is that the adults' intercourse? I really hate that!
Congratulations with you promotion. Major Katsuragi.
The Me who is recognized is the Me who is performing
a role in order to be appreciated.
It's not the true Me.
The true Me is always crying.
Yes. I am happy!
Am I happy?
I am happy.
Am I happy?
I am happy....?
Am I happy?
NO!
This is not happiness!
What's happiness?
This is not the true Me!
I am only trying to think so.
Otherwise, we cannot live?
We are unstable unless we are together.
Unstable.
Unless someone is in the same bed.
You are afraid to sleep alone?
You are tired of sleeping alone?
Or does sleeping alone remind you of how empty your life is?
Then, Anybody will do.
NO!
YES, you wish to get some simple joy.
You are trying to cure your mind with temporary escape.
You are making use of GUYS.
NO NO NO WAY!
What does she really wish?
Where am I?
It's my mind within Asuka's.
Then, it's my mind within Shinji.
In the case of Soryuu Asuka Langley.
What do you hope?
I can live alone.
I don't need either daddy or mom.
I live alone.
I won't cry anymore.
Yet, I am crying.
Why am I crying?
It's difficult for me to deal with that child.
That's not like you, a doctor.
A Doctor is a human being,
as I said before.
Still, you're a traind professional, how can you...
She acts too much like an adult, and rejects me completely.
Sometimes she scares me.
Haven't you had that feeling with her?
Well,
Anyhow, you are Asuka's mother, after all.
I became your wife before that.
Aren't you both?
From a social persective, yes.
However, I can quit being her mother at anytime.
...but you cannot quit being her father.
Well, you could say that.
NO! STOP!
Don't quit being my mother!
I'll be a good child!
So, don't quit being my mother.
So, look at me!
Stop MOM, don't kill me!
Your daddy hates your mommy.
Your daddy deserted me.
No, he never loved me to begin with.
He didn't need me at all.
So, let's die together with mom.
Daddy does not need us.
Am I a waste?
Am I useless?
Let's die together.
NO!
I'm not your doll.
I can think by myself, I can live by myself.
Then, my mommy was hanging from the cealing.
She looked so happy.
But I hated her face back then.
I don't wanna die.
I don't wanna let myself disappear.
I don't like boys.
I don't like daddy, mom.
I don't like anybody!
Nobody protects me.
Nobody is by me.
What does she wish?
So, I do live alone.
But I don't want that.
It's painful.
I don't wanna be alone.
I don't wanna be alone!
Don't leave me.
Don't desert me.
Don't kill me.
What's this?
This is the Instrumentality of Man project that
your father has been carrying out.
This is it?
This is part of it, I think.
The truth is yet unknown to us.
The things you perceive constitute the truth.
Things within you.
And the things recorded in your memory will be your truth.
There is a truth that changes through time.
This is the truth.
The result of everything, is this?
Out of many truths, one is this.
That's the result you wished.
I wished?
Yes.
The destruction, the world, where nobody would be saved.
NO. It's that nobody saved me.
Nobody can save you.
This is what you wished for.
The destruction, the death, the return to nothingness.
All of these, you did wish.
This is the reality.
What's the reality?
Your world.
With time, with space, with other people, the world of your own.
The world where how to accept things and how to perceive things
are absolutely up to you.
It's the world where you just wait for others to give you something.
That is reality.
This is your world no matter what.
It's the the world where everything is already set isn't it?
No, it's the world that you are setting.
The world where your mind decides what will be.
That's the reality.
Whether it's the will to live.
or the wish to die, that is up to you.
Are you saying that this darkness, this insane world...
are what I wished?
Yes.
A closed world where nobody but you is comfortable.
That is the very world you wished for.
To protect your weak mind.
To protect your joy.
This is the result.
In a closed space with nobody but you in it,
others cannot live.
But you wished the world to close on yourself.
Excluding what you hate, you wished a world of solitude.
That's the world you created, a private haven in the recesses of your mind.
This is one of the possible conclusions.
A fate which you chose.
Instrumentality continues...
Translated by Kentaro ONIZUKA
From the script captured by Kenji MATSUOKA
Timed and Subtitled by VAZ
Next time
A conclusion, that must follow a beginning.
Our hope will be lead to a destruction?
Our hope will be the very death?
The final episode: "The beast that shouted 'I' in the heart of the world."